Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Just...

I feel like my life has been a series of "justs" recently. ... Just sit down and write a thousand words a day, only a thousand. If you want to do more you can, but just worry about the thousand. ... Just get dressed in your workout clothes and start the walk... just run 60 seconds before you can walk again. ... Just make around the lake one more time. ... Just get through the next urgent item on the "to-list"... just what you need to do to keep ahead of the deadlines. ...Just make it through today and then it will be closer to the weekend. ... Just be patient about FHT... it's making it's way out into the world, just wait and you'll start getting more feedback, more news, more indicators.

Sometimes I totally feel like balance in life narrows down to these justs... just keep moving forward. That's not to say there aren't things that egg me on and get me excited, making the process and journey more fun like little rewards along the way. Loving the book I'm writing makes me excited to sit down and write, excited when I get through another scene. Getting through a training session makes me proud, makes me want to keep going. Seeing mentions of my book online (like as a "Kids' Galleys to Grab" in Publishers Weekly) keeps me floating for days!

And I take the time to savor these moments, to pull myself out of the perpetual forward motion and say "Hey, that's pretty cool! Great job on getting your run in today! Yay for finishing those 1k words! And w00t for zombies!" I do think that when things get hectic (like two jobs, a wedding to plan, a family to talk to (hi family!! I'll call, I promise!!)), that it's easy to head down, just make it through. But sometimes you forget to raise your head and suddenly it's August -- almost the end of August -- and you go, "What the.... what happened to my year!?!"

This time a year ago I just started sending out query letters. I'd just quit my job at my old firm. JP and I were looking for a home for our brain damaged dog, Daphne. I'm shocked at how much can change in a year! And let me tell you, the past year? A total and utter dream come true. I just need to relax, to just let time be what it's going to be. To just sit back and enjoy the ride because I have a feeling that the next year is going to be pretty cool too :)

I just have to go write 1k words real quick first :)

4 comments:

Angie Frazier said...

Carrie, I'm really looking forward to reading your novel when it debuts. And I know--what a difference a year can make! I've been doing the whole "a year ago, this is what was happening" and it's mind-blowing sometimes. Good luck with your 1K for the day!

Hutch said...

Hi! I can't wait for your book to come out, it sounds pretty awesome. It's really great reading that someone else is managing the whole: day job/writing/what happened to my year thing.

My last year has been all write write write, frantically edit edit edit, but I think I've got two really good books done. It's awesome to know that there is light on the other side of the tunnel.
Good luck!

Patrick said...

Just watch out for the zombies

Carrie said...

Thanks Angie! I love thinking back a year! It's totally crazy how things change!!

Hutch - I think you're dead on about just write write write and edit edit edit (especially the edit part).

hahha Patrick!!!